#smellpricketts, whoopsie!

Ricketts Scrambles to Pick up Clearly Labeled Vial of Death Penalty Drugs After It Falls from His Pocket During Speech

Hastings Nebraska (SN) - A simple appearance and a short speech for a pro-life rally at St. Cecilia's Catholic Church went sideways Thursday night after a clearly labeled vial of death penalty drugs fell from Governor Pete Rickett's suit jacket during a speech. The vial, labeled "Daddy's Lethal Injection Cocktail!" which proceeded to bounce off… Continue reading Ricketts Scrambles to Pick up Clearly Labeled Vial of Death Penalty Drugs After It Falls from His Pocket During Speech

#smellpricketts, From the editor

Smell Nebraska Unveils PETE RICKETTS WEEK

Greetings bald, thumb/cock skull enthusiasts! Smell Nebraska has reluctantly dedicated this week to Nebraska's 40th Governor. We aren't sure why. Stay tuned throughout the week for #smellpricketts coverage old and new, and please, honor and share the hash tag. -Editor

sculptures, the devil, the dumb

Complete Fucking Idiots Think Spider-Man’s Hands Are Devil Horns

Lincoln NE (SN) - A complete fucking idiot emailed the Mayor’s office complaining that a statue of Spiderman’s hands were “demonic, perverse, anti-christian, a hate crime against the church, and way too big for Spiderman.” City ombudsman (whatever that is) Liz Quenzer had a hearty laugh at the email. “Of course it’s demonic. We have… Continue reading Complete Fucking Idiots Think Spider-Man’s Hands Are Devil Horns

a music city without you, sorry

Machete Archive Returns, Reminds Every Other Local Musician That They Suck Balls at Their Instrument

Lincoln NE (SN) - Dozens of musical aspirations were crushed Saturday evening as Lincoln's Machete Archive reunited to, once again, prove that they are boundlessly and technically more talented than you at their respected instruments. The trio, who headlined a commanding line-up at Duffy's Tavern, effortlessly pumped out jam after jam of their unique blend… Continue reading Machete Archive Returns, Reminds Every Other Local Musician That They Suck Balls at Their Instrument

gentrification, poor people

Pastor Deems Every Neighborhood North of Van Dorn “Breeding Ground for Problems”

Lincoln NE (SN) - With buildings up to 147 years old in the neighborhoods spanning South street all the way to Superior, it is no surprise that parts of the region would be reserved for middle and low income housing. Jeff Heerspink, pastor of the F Street Neighborhood Church, has come forward with a solution… Continue reading Pastor Deems Every Neighborhood North of Van Dorn “Breeding Ground for Problems”

crime beat, good for him

Leirion Gifts Key to the City to Parking Garage Freak-Out Guy

Lincoln NE (SN) - The mystery behind Friday morning's reported "parking gate hate" thickened this morning as Mayor Leirion Gaylor Baird announced she was ready to publicly honor the unknown white male. "Whoever you are, please call my office" the Mayor said in a press conference. "The $3,200 in damages is pocket change in contrast… Continue reading Leirion Gifts Key to the City to Parking Garage Freak-Out Guy

gaming, homophobia, politics

Mayoral Runner-Up Returning to Job as Villain in Nintendo Boxing Game

Kyoto Japan (SN) - With her dreams of becoming mayor of Lincoln, Nebraska completely smashed to pieces Tuesday night, former one-term city councilwoman Cyndi Lamm must return to her lifelong career of being an evil boxer in a Nintendo game. "We allowed Lamm to take a sabbatical from our game to pursue her dreams of… Continue reading Mayoral Runner-Up Returning to Job as Villain in Nintendo Boxing Game