Lincoln NE (SN) - The stars have aligned, and Nebraska Governor Pete Ricketts will finally fulfill a campaign promise, executing a death row inmate, and just days shy of his 54th birthday on Sunday, August 19th. An aide reported the Governor is "obviously, very excited." "Unless some bull-shit red tape of an appeal spawns out… Continue reading Governor Pete Ricketts Finally Completes His Life’s Work of Killing a Death Row Inmate Just Days Before His 54th Birthday
Lincoln NE (SN) - Believing that he was just stopping by for an ordinary dinner with his girlfriend’s parents, 25 year-old Scott Walton was surprised to find out he was at a gender reveal party to find out the sex of his own child, of which, up to this moment, he did not know existed.… Continue reading Local Boyfriend Surprised By Surprise Gender Reveal Party
Let's face it. Being an adult is not fire emoji. Sure you slip your TOMS slip-ons on one after the other like everyone else, but you're a different kind of grown up, the kind that takes a few Instagrams of your cat before zipping your fixed gear over to Open Harvest on your commute to… Continue reading Opinion: Adulting is Hard When You Use Stupid Fucking Made Up Words Like “Adulting”
What started out as a fun night out with friends turned tragic Monday night, when local man Bryce Cartwright realized the pointlessness of his existence in the middle of drinking a Duffy’s fishbowl. Cartwright and a group of friends got together to celebrate their rare Monday evening off of work. Cartwright’s best friend, Daniel Morton,… Continue reading Local Man Struck by Existential Angst Mid Duffy’s Fishbowl
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