No one knows more about the highest political office, held entirely by grumpy straight males, than grumpy straight males like you. You're a political junkie, and the 2020 race has officially started. Time to whip your dick out and start measuring it publicly. How else are your followers going know that Bernie Sanders just isn't… Continue reading Facebook Friends “Delighted” to Read Your Pompous Mansplaining About Democratic Presidential Candidates
Well here we are. You are currently reading the two hundredth publication from Nebraska's hardest working real news powerhouse. What better way to celebrate than with a week long mother fucking pizza party. Our news team assembled early Sunday at Lincoln's Cici's Pizza Buffet to get our bread sticks in a row regarding a full… Continue reading Smell Nebraska Unveils PIZZA WEEK
Voyaging as far away from either ocean as you can in the United States of America, you may stumble across Nebraska. We are a simple and proud bunch, after all, we live THE GOOD LIFE. We may be as bland as the white mom one-note chili cooked by one-note white Midwestern moms, but our non-spiced… Continue reading Nebraska Changes Tourism Slogan: “Our Football Team Doesn’t Win and Our Governor Looks Like A Human Cock”
Did you know that every time you "Like" one of our Instagram photos, Facebook posts, or Twitter Tweets, a loving warmth rushes over our the editorial staff? Suddenly all of their hard work wasn't for nothing, and the post-lunch slump of their shift at Nelnet is just a little less shitty as fuck. Did you… Continue reading Complete Idiots Think Our Articles Are Real – Here’s How You Can Help
Being the most exclusive news source in Nebraska is a lot of work for one lone high school kid. Smell Nebraska is looking for smug, opinionated, unreliable, and difficult to work with candidates for our Fall 2018 internship program. Our positions range from taking photos of the miserable losers getting drunk at 2pm on a… Continue reading Apply for Smell Nebraska’s Fall 2018 Internships
My loyal subscribers. How have you been? It's been a while! Wait, how could you?! Why did you mutter those lyrics to that Staind song after I said that? You are truly terrible. Seriously. That is it for the editor's note. Fuck you. I'm done for today.
You read it. Welcome to Smell Nebraska's first annual Sandwich Week! Wikipedia describes a sandwich as "a food typically consisting of vegetables, sliced cheese or meat, placed on or between slices of bread, or more generally any dish wherein two or more pieces of bread serve as a container or wrapper for another food type."… Continue reading Smell Nebraska Introduces Sandwich Week!