Lincoln NE (SN) – Seated on a bench at the front of the Nebraska Legislature, 20 year-old legislative page Craig Thompson nervously awaits his next assignment, praying and hoping it’s to help second year representative Anna Wishart.
“Oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man, oh man,” the googly-eyed Thompson whispered to himself. “I’m up next. Does she need me to take some papers to her office? Does she need some apple juice? I could do that. I could totally do that.”
When a legislator needs something and doesn’t want to leave their desk, the elected official hits the page light at their desk and the next page in line gets up to fulfill their task. Pages help the senators take things to their office or any other minor errand. The excited Thompson gets butterflies every time it’s his turn, hoping Sen. Wishart needs something.
“I make sure to make her coffee ready, just like she likes it every morning. I’m sure she appreciates that,” Thompson continued to think to himself. “She’s so cool. She’s trying to pass that medical marijuana bill. It’s like she’s the only senator in this bass ackward state with any common sense to even try to do that. I wonder if she has a boyfriend, I hope not but I’m sure she does. She has to. Girls like that aren’t single. I think she helps homeless people too. She’s so cute. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. I’m next!”
Sadly, Thompson’s hopes of an incredibly brief and unremarkable interaction with Wishart were dashed when Senator Mark Kolterman hit his light, and asked Thompson to run out to his car and grab his Imodium A-D.