Sports ‘n Snorts |
Lincoln NE (SN) – The girls state high school basketball tournament is in full swing attracting thousands of basketball fans and dozens of weird creeps.
“This and state volleyball are my favorite times of the year,” says Marvin Daniels (age 46). “I really enjoy the competition and the games. Good games. Games are good…” Daniels, wearing an extra snug My Little Pony T-shirt and a Koopa Troopa (just making a guess here, it’s a spikey turtle?) backpack, has a front row seat at Pinnacle Bank arena for the Class A and B games held here. “I’ll be here for all the games. I’m not going anywhere. Oh! Floor ball! Get it… get it.. yeah..” Daniels trailed off and stared while two players wrestled on the floor for a jump ball, then Daniels started to sniff a bunch of times and zoned out completely.
Other weirdos are not content to just watch. Eric Mulligan (age 37) brought his iPad with him to record all the games. “I use this because it has 128 gigs and that’s enough to get most of the games recorded. Then I take it home and put together a highlight real of all my favorite ones, I mean, the best plays of each game. I’ll be here for every game, today, tomorrow, and even, oh hold on, they are lined up for a free toss. Oh yeah…”
For Daniels, it’s all about the love of the game. “I just love sports. All kinds, women’s basketball, women’s tennis, volleyball, gymnastics, child beauty pageants, you name it. Love the competition. I love sports. Looks like they are coming back from intermission. Can’t talk now. C’mon girls! Let’s do some points!”
Weird creeps are easy to spot as they usually travel alone and have dirty clothes, unkempt hair, a thin gross mustache, and some sort of fanny pack. They often have a 64 ounce fountain drink at all times, for hydration. If you happen to see one, maintain a safe distance. Don’t confront a creep on your own. While they are technically not dangerous or doing anything illegal, they are still fucking weird.